2020 has definitely been a year like none of us have imagined. There have definitely been many moments of sadness, anger, and frustration as it’s been an emotional roller coaster. People have adjusted their plans and quarantined for many months. I understand why people are frustrated with the year and looking forward to a fresh start in 2021. But let’s pause and find some good from the past 9+ months. It is personally frustrating when I hear many others say this was the worst year ever as it’s the year I became a mom. I know they ‘re not attacking me, but when people say, nothing good happened this year it hurts because my daughter is a shining light and definitely a good thing to come from 2020.
Yes, I was not expecting to have a baby during a pandemic when we found out we were pregnant August 2019. There are many moments where I wish things had been different. No one visited after she was born, she has still not met all her aunts and uncles in addition to extended families, we can’t do indoor playdates or baby classes. She knows the world through the screens of Zoom and FaceTime. I can only cross my fingers that we can safely celebrate her first birthday with family and friends.
Yet it still hurts when people say this was the worst year ever because this year brought me new joy and purpose. I know that’s not the case for everyone. I know there may be more frustrating, negative moments overall than positive moments. But for everyone, something positive must have happened.
Maybe you reconnected with family and friends. At the beginning of the pandemic, we played virtual games with family and scheduled a Zoom call with college friends; that Zoom call has now become a weekly event, and people attend when they can. Maybe you appreciated sleeping in and not having to commute. Maybe you started working out-my virtual yoga classes have been enjoyable (again, nice not having to commute with a baby!) and been walking a lot outside. Maybe you started cooking/baking more (definitely went on a cookie binge!) or found a new hobby (working on all the Lego sets we’ve bought over the past years).
No, this year has not been easy, and I also have gone through a wave of emotions. Yes, there are things I grieve and stress and worry about and wish were normal. But there have been positives in terms of self-discovery, connectedness, self care, and family time. Let’s focus on those instead of all the negative and frustrating ones.
Happy New Year and a toast to a brighter 2021 together.
Karen Achtman 